noite de são joão [begining of a quest]

the mood is of festivities. the entire city came to the street. light hearted and merry, people from all ages gather around, eating, drinking, dancing, and turning day-to-day places into a big warm coloured, music filled, festival. stalls, tents, improvised tables, balconies, and barbecues are everywhere. a huge crowd flows into the city centre: the heart of all of it.

a foreigner in a known land, i walk down the streets, letting myself be led by the crowd. the first breeze fills my soul, and the thousand different scents whisper the beginning of an inflexion point in my life: this is going to be a different summer…

“come closer young man”, an old woman with infinite blue eyes and shades of white signs me to come to her. “you look out of place: physically you’re here, but your heart wanders across your own doubts trying to find its own way”
without talking, i look into her eyes and smile, letting her know how right she is.

“here” – her crumpled hand takes mine, leading me to a stall packed with coloured paper balloons.
“take this” – she hands me a small piece of paper “ask saint john to help you, write down what you yearn the most, your greatest desire, your greatest dream: let go whatever is restraining your heart. let yourself go and let fate and magic surround you in your way”
i frown, not sure what to make of it, and proudly pretend to look puzzled –“don’t worry I won’t look!” she says looking offended, she looks deep in my eyes, grabs my hand again, and changes her face into a warm, wise grin - “just let yourself go, don’t be so defensive, and let your heart out”

i give in. i take the paper and write everything i was holding on to. i write my greatest desire, my greatest fear, letting everything that burdens my heart and soul in a small piece of paper. feeling vulnerable and exposed i hand the paper back to her.

in a thousand year old gesture, she kindly takes it from my hand and places it in a blue and green balloon.
“light it up, and let it go”
getting a candle from the table, i light it up, and admire it flying up, joining thousands of others, that just like mine, carry the hearts and anchors of dreamers.
a feeling of completeness, peace and happiness invades my entire body.

despite all noise, for a brief moment the whole world stops and turns silent.
i lower my eyes, and in the crowd, i recognise you.

not sure if you’re real or a dream, my eyes glow, calling you...
... and amid thousands of people, you look at me and smile.

“i hope, our saint helps you find your own way” – the old lady says, now looking eternal and engulfed in an almost imperceptible octarine glow
“i think he just did”, i reply smiling at her, and turning my back i leave her to look for you.