cinderella

…but nothing lasts forever,
always is a lie
though i know it in my heart:
that i’ll love you
‘till the day i die

desencontros

in the end, we're all but lost souls trying to live everyday the best we can...

everywhere i look, i only find people who fail to believe, who are too hurt to get back to that special place where everything is amazing, magic and possible.
¨
[after all, nothing is more painful than a shattered dream]

viajante

my [chosen] new travel companions, for my next trip, must be lost in some hidden magical bookstore somewhere in Lisbon

Al Berto (anjo mudo) and Milan Kundera (immortality), where can i find you?

under the milky way

i dream of someone who dreams [with] me. it's that simple

[thank you JGT]

renouncement [like so many people]

mónica é uma pessoa tão extraordinária que consegue simultaneamente: ser boa mãe de família, ser chiquíssima, ser dirigente da "liga internacional das mulheres inúteis", ajudar o marido nos negócios, fazer ginástica todas as manhãs, ser pontual, ter imensos amigos, dar muitos jantares, ir a muitos jantares, não fumar, não envelhecer, gostar de toda a gente, gostar dela, dizer bem de toda a gente, toda a gente dizer bem dela, coleccionar colheres so séc. xvii, jogar golfe, deitar-se tarde, levantar-se cedo, comer iogurte, fazer ioga, gostar de pintura abstracta, ser sócia de todas as sociedades musicais, estar sempre divertida, ser um exemplo de virtudes, ter muito sucesso e ser muito séria.

tenho conhecido na vida muitas pessoas parecidas com a mónica. mas são só a sua caricatura. esquecem-se sempre ou do ioga ou da pintura abstracta.

por trás de tudo isto há um trabalho severo e sem tréguas e uma disciplina rigorosa e constante. pode-se dizer que mónica trabalha de sol a sol.

de facto, para conquistar todo o sucesso e todos os gloriosos bens que possui, mónica teve que renunciar a três coisas: à poesia, ao amor e à santidade.

a poesia é oferecida a cada pessoa só uma vez e o efeito da negação é irreversível. o amor é oferecido raramente e aquele que o nega algumas vezes depois não o encontra mais. mas a santidade é oferecida a cada pessoa de novo cada dia, e por isso aqueles que renunciam à santidade são obrigados a repetir a negação todos os dias.

isso obriga mónica a observar uma disciplina [muito] severa....

Sophia de Mello Breyner in Contos Exemplares

value investor

in the [pseudo] complex world of high finance, there is the common knowledge that in order to invest, you need to “enter” (i.e. buy) a position (i.e. investment) when it’s low (i.e. cheap), and “exit” when it’s high (i.e. expensive). investors call this phenomenon ‘riding the waive’.

the real talent in order to do so is to find those precise moments when to take a position [or when to leave], when there is a firm belief that whatever you’ll be doing will turn out to be good, to yield a good return.

some investors believe in gut feeling, entering an investment just because they like it, they “feel” it is going to be the next best thing close to winning the lottery [some go even further, saying that it better than…]. others believe that there are some strange and mystic forces that drive everything in the universe, including investments, and they dedicate their life in trying to predict the movements of a tick in a computer screen, based on the exact same pattern they saw in the year 1967, and that must mean something. some others don’t have a clue, and they choose whatever the flavour of the month is: “if everyone is doing it, i surely won’t be the last in line …”

and finally we have the value investor. these are the most cunning and thorough of them. they respect the market and their players. they choose pretty well their targets, devoting time, patience and all available resources to decide their move: get in, get out or do nothing. the basic principle behind this strategy is only to be part of investments that have perceivable [and understandable] future value: that have significant upside potential. keeping an ever vigilante spirit, and humbleness [they know that there are always people smarter, stronger and more informed] they reassess their options and actions continuously.

although they look at everything with a cold eye and mind, they have an enormous passion for it, and are extremely disciplined.
they get in and get out, only when they perceive true value add [or the absence of it].

[the most important thing is that] it matters not if they are winning or loosing, value is something that is quite perceptible [and tangible] to them. they’ll enter and exit a party at their own timing. not a minute sooner, nor a minute later. even when everyone thinks it is only getting good, even when it blows up in their face.

minimum inflection point

aqueles que me têm muito amor
não sabem o que sinto e o que sou...
não sabem que passou, um dia, a dor
à minha porta e, nesse dia, entrou.
e é desde então que eu sinto este pavor,
este frio que anda em mim, e que gelou
o que de bom me deu nosso senhor!
se eu nem sei por onde ando e onde vou!!

sinto os passos de dor, essa cadência
que é já tortura infinda, que é demência!
que é já vontade doida de gritar!

e é sempre a mesma mágoa, o mesmo tédio,
a mesma angústia funda, sem remédio,
andando atrás de mim, sem me largar!

Florbela Espanca

inner conflict

it’s not that she doesn’t think things through...
it’s just that...
if in her,
love and mind would arm-wrestle together,
love would probably break mind’s arm
[and probably the table too...]

gede [n.p.m. gódê]

you know, i may be very simple but, for me, Karma is like this:
imagine you plant rice, what do you get? rice, right? imagine that you plant well, you will get many seeds for then to plant even more rice.

such is karma, whatever you seed, sooner or later you will harvest. also important to know, karma and reincarnation are together, they are one. so i may get the karma tomorrow, or only on another life time.

take for example, that girl over there. her parents wealthy. she got to go to nice school, go to college, and get good job. I am poor and need to work hard to get what i need. why is that? she is already collecting the good karma she planted in another life. i still need to plant more.

and don't forget, very, very important: karma works both ways, if you plant good, you will harvest good. if you plant bad, you will harvest bad

sr. engenheiro

os olhos azul muito claros, mostravam uma ternura e um olhar curioso para um mundo onde nem sempre compreendia muitas das coisas “dos tempos modernos”, mas onde acreditava plenamente que se os valores fossem fortes, que as pessoas acabariam por fazer sempre o correcto.

simpático por natureza, metia conversa com qualquer pessoa que lhe devolvesse o sorriso, e tinha sempre o cuidado de “não ser indelicado”. no entanto, tinha um espírito reservado e era naturalmente introspectivo.

todos os que trabalharam com ele, falam do talento, da justiça e da rectidão do sr. engenheiro.

a sua desenvoltura e a capacidade de aprendizagem enormes, contribuíam para a mestria em tudo o que eram trabalhos manuais: fazer mesas, quadros, ou tapetes de arraiolos com 15 metros de comprimento que doava à igreja, eram actividades que o “ajudavam a pensar”. não gostava de viajar de avião, e por isso conheceu toda a europa de carro, com pé pesado, porque “os carros bons são para isso”.

os conselhos, histórias, e enorme sabedoria eram partilhadas numa partida de crapot, ou numa lenta tarde de domingo à frente de uma lareira com um copo grande de coca-cola na mão [que não bebia mas que tinha sempre para os netos que "gostavam dessas coisas"].

era rígido na educação dos filhos, que contrastava com episódios de carinho e piadas que contava, sempre exigindo que cada um tivesse o seu papel na família e sociedade, sempre dando o seu melhor.
apoiou a sua mulher em todos os seus projectos, e ambos deixaram uma obra de caridade e de valores que marcaram profundamente uma pequena aldeia ao lado do mar.

sempre amigo, bom com todos os que o seguiam, deixou mais de três gerações com o mais profundo carinho, respeito e admiração. quando eu mais precisei, ele esteve lá para mim.

ontem, no culminar de uma doença ingrata, degenerativa e humilhante, fechou os olhos pela última vez.
vou sentir a sua falta...

make a wish

sometimes in life you'll cross with a shooting star.
a comet that is crossing the universe,
leaving a trail of light for everyone to see and admire
but not really stopping anywhere.
a beautiful burning flame
doomed to travel to infinity.

it may impact your life [or not],
give yourself some sense of direction,
or just light you when you need it,
and bring you faith in a bigger plan

but you'll never be able to stop it
nor to change its direction,
there is nothing you can really do,
but to let it fulfil its destiny
alone,
and watch the light fade away…

she

simple, but complicated,
intelligent, but naïve,
innocent, but teasing,
sensitive, but tough,
strong minded, but with an open mind,
warm hearted, but cold to who doesn’t care,
pure, but sexy,
insecure, but confident,
extrovert, but reserved,
proud, but humble,
hurt, but smiling
ruthless, but forgiving
detached, but passionate,
funny, but serious,
loving, but free spirit,
lost, but determined,
lonely, but surrounded by friends [and more than that]
dreamily, but down-to-earth,
real, but magical
closed, but blooming
beautiful, no buts

quem ama não dorme

..while growing up he is considered strange by the other people and discovers his love to music, especially to playing the organ at the local church. After experiencing an "acoustic wonder", his eye color changes and he can hear even the most subtle sounds. He falls in love with Elsbeth, the sister of Peter, a neighbor's son, who has loving feelings towards him ever since. After Elsbeth marries someone else, he decides to end his life by not sleeping anymore

the story of a musician, who brought his life to an end at the age of 22 having decided not to sleep any more. In a mountain village isolated from the world, the fate is fulfilled by a man mortally afflicted by a musical genius which prevents him from following the beating of his heart and settling for happiness with the woman whom he loves more than his own life

treasures from the chest II [the story of a lost key]

Part I:
It's not like you don't like the sun, it's just that the rain makes you feel cosy and protected when you're home. You love love stories and valiant discreet princes. You love OTH and all the series that make you dream and sight. You don't like Sci fi nor anything purely fictional because: it's not possible! You Love art and music as it transports you to another world where all the strokes were perfectly and harmoniously out, surrounded by music that lifts up your soul. You say you don't like surprises, as they're out of your control, but you love to be positively surprised. You love to be a princess, and to feel protected, and the boy must be the one to do the work…

Part II:
You want to move to Paris, lead a new exciting life, and leave the small town behind, but you're afraid that you'll lose your happy places, and you don't have any safe haven there yet. You love your dog, although sometimes he can be a real pain. You love your family, and it kills you to feel that they're spreading and fleeing from each other. You don't mind the distances, as long as you're close to the heart. You love your friends, and love to know that there are a precious few that no matter what will always be there. You like to feel that you're unique and special, but you don't like the loneliness. You love your independence, the quiet solitude of the night and to feel in control. You have been deeply hurt in the past, and you're scared that the person you've once been will never come back. You're not sure if you're ever going to trust or give yourself to someone for real again. You're proud and stubborn, you hate when other people are right and you're not. You're beautiful, inside and outside, but you're afraid to look into the mirror as you're not sure what you're going to see. You love flowers, chocolate and White. You love red wine, candles and to feel wanted.

Part III:
You love sexy underwear and you love to look into everything with a different set of eyes: you love to capture those unique moments that are perceptible only to those who know how to look. You love painting, but you lost your drive and are not sure how to get it again. You’re sexy and when you smile the world around is a better place. You like to cook, and love to host for the people you love. You really like your home, but right now, the walls have too many memories. You love anything that is spontaneous and pure from the heart, and you can't stand any feeble attempts to imitate it (you've got a pretty good eye to spot them). You easily get bored, drifting away to other worlds, whenever you're disliking the current one. You can't stand disappointment and people that are not true. You like to explore new places (selective ones), make them your special place. You like pretty much to eat, and anything that can get more sugar on it, it's good. You have a big heart, but you still don't know how to use it without leading to misunderstandings. You're not sure what the future holds, you don't even know what you want from it, but you have it clear what you don't want. You're afraid that some people think you're futile, just because you have a different way of looking at things. You love to speak through your eyes, and show what words would only ruin.

to forget a dream

what do you do, when you forgot how to forget?...
and when you don't remember how to dream?...

[I want to play]

Someone asks you to play, just play.
Enjoy your time in the sun and don't whine about it

françois

Filho de pai franceses, mas nascido em Barcelona. Tem os olhos azuis muito claros, cabelo totalmente branco e a cara marcada pela experiência. Quando fala, o seu sorriso e simpatia são contagiantes, e quando começa a contar as histórias das suas viagens e das pessoas que conheceu, os seus olhos mergulham numa feliz nostalgia.

Já viveu em Barcelona, Madrid, Colombia, Venezuela, Gabão, África do Sul Macau, Irão, Hong Kong, entre outros, e agora, já a pensar em retirar-se da vida activa, vive em Paris.
Nas negociações, tem a astúcia e a inteligência daqueles que sabem o que estão a fazer. E, apesar de ser discreto, a sua presença é forte e não passa despercebida.

A sua mãe casou-se três vezes, dois dos casamentos, com condenados à pena de morte.
Está agora a escrever um livro sobre a sua vida...

the dark one

You have summoned me. You desperately needed me. I am the bastard son of the sixth, of the sixth, of the sixth priest. My bare existence is a sin, and proof of human weakness. My powers know no limits and my heart is dark.

I stand by you on the crossroads of your life, I always point you the easy way [which isn’t, of course, the best one]. I don’t judge you nor tell you what to do [and that is why you need me so bad], you remain the same to me whatever you do. I may, however, tilt you for the easy conquests, immediate pleasure, or anything that pleases me in making you do so. I’ll praise you, making you believe you’re anything special, just to break you for my own delight.

I know you’re weak: your dark desires, failures, disappointments, treasons and crimes are just something that I would expect. I now control every single move of yours, and since you’re so proud, you’ll never be able to get out of my spell.

You weren’t like this; you were even once immune to me – holding yourself to the what-so-called God of yours. But I am always alert, I noticed how you changed and at the first opportunity, I started my own workings.

On the day you were down and weak, I started whispering. Singing. Luring you to my own trap. I showed you the greatest human desires, and made you believe they were your own. The masterpiece was, I admit, making you to fall in love with me.

You see, the only way you could’ve not fallen [and I hold in so low esteem, that I may even tell you this, knowing that it will never backfire], was by not being selfish. Only truth, purity of feelings, actions and selfless love can break my spells, and are immune to my curse. Luckily you have none. You can only think, praise and whine on yourself. The rest of the world is there to feed your own ego. And I led you to think, I was like anyone else. The game was set, and I wanted to play.

I let you believe you loved, and led you to believe that you were loved back [it was so much fun]. I got to seed jealousy, hatred and lies into your heart. I left you in a permanent state of doubt and confusion. Everything I did was ambiguous, none of it was complete. I released small ideas, pretending feelings so that you, filling in the gaps, created your own illusion. I never committed, but I never let you go. I never went for a full blow, but slowly tortured you, hurting and diminishing you day by day. I even took away your sleep and dreams, and watched you pathetically fight for a love that simply didn’t exist.

You thought of yourself noble, but I managed to completely poison your heart. Tainted it black. Patiently, I fed you with your own [old and new] fears, allowing them grow bigger. Showing you twisted images, and telling you incomplete stories to let jealously, obsession and suspicion corrupt your heart. You’re trapped in yourself, in a dark pit of human pain and despair. And the greatest thing of all is that I even managed to make you give your own soul away, just for the promise of [a fake and selfish] love.

Now, you will corrupt anyone who comes along and unless someone can break the enchantment [which I seriously doubt], your life will be void, unhappy and meaningless. You will spread my venom, my work of art.

You stood no chance.