the big day is coming...

viajante

my [chosen] new travel companions, for my next trip, must be lost in some hidden magical bookstore somewhere in Lisbon

Al Berto (anjo mudo) and Milan Kundera (immortality), where can i find you?

[you are too good...]

if you don't want to be miserable for the rest of your life, look hard [and truly] to what you got in front of you, and grow [the fuck] up.

the city

tonight i'll wander over the cobblestones of a city that once saw me leave:
lost, i'm under a night sky that’s no longer mine

i hope you're happy...

... i really do

the stones of salamanca keep thousands of stories

under the milky way

i dream of someone who dreams [with] me. it's that simple

[thank you JGT]

off to the roman college city

i still haven't found what i'm looking for

zen philosophy says that once you stop looking for what you earn so much, your greatest desire will find you [i stopped looking…]

life is ...

it takes no time to fall in love
but it takes you years to know what love is
and it takes some fears to make you trust
it takes those tears to make it rust
it takes the dust to have it polished

renouncement [like so many people]

mónica é uma pessoa tão extraordinária que consegue simultaneamente: ser boa mãe de família, ser chiquíssima, ser dirigente da "liga internacional das mulheres inúteis", ajudar o marido nos negócios, fazer ginástica todas as manhãs, ser pontual, ter imensos amigos, dar muitos jantares, ir a muitos jantares, não fumar, não envelhecer, gostar de toda a gente, gostar dela, dizer bem de toda a gente, toda a gente dizer bem dela, coleccionar colheres so séc. xvii, jogar golfe, deitar-se tarde, levantar-se cedo, comer iogurte, fazer ioga, gostar de pintura abstracta, ser sócia de todas as sociedades musicais, estar sempre divertida, ser um exemplo de virtudes, ter muito sucesso e ser muito séria.

tenho conhecido na vida muitas pessoas parecidas com a mónica. mas são só a sua caricatura. esquecem-se sempre ou do ioga ou da pintura abstracta.

por trás de tudo isto há um trabalho severo e sem tréguas e uma disciplina rigorosa e constante. pode-se dizer que mónica trabalha de sol a sol.

de facto, para conquistar todo o sucesso e todos os gloriosos bens que possui, mónica teve que renunciar a três coisas: à poesia, ao amor e à santidade.

a poesia é oferecida a cada pessoa só uma vez e o efeito da negação é irreversível. o amor é oferecido raramente e aquele que o nega algumas vezes depois não o encontra mais. mas a santidade é oferecida a cada pessoa de novo cada dia, e por isso aqueles que renunciam à santidade são obrigados a repetir a negação todos os dias.

isso obriga mónica a observar uma disciplina [muito] severa....

Sophia de Mello Breyner in Contos Exemplares

i missed you

all that i leave behind

i'm not sure, if all the numbness
i'm feeling right now,
is due to exhaustion,
or due to the tornado
that stormed my soul
in the last few weeks.

dreams

[all] my life,
is changing everyday,
[in] every possible way

though my dreams...
[they're] never quite as it seems,
[it's] never quite as it seems...

[silently] seeking you and dreaming on loving you

te sigo buscando tanto
[pero] tu en mi nunca te has fijado
por eso te tengo que inventar
por eso te tengo que encontrar

one thing i'd like to clear ...

...i'm not trying to save the world
[i just want you]

all these words i just don't say...

...and nothing else matters

waiting

but all day long i heal for the honey
waitin' for the one i love
the noons are hot with heartache aplenty
i'm lovesick and undone

poised, unrefined
delicate and loosely lined
oh i am a dreamer
but i'll deny it til' the day i die

you have three choices in life...

(i) be good
(ii) get good
(iii) give up

[the third is not really an option]

perfection is overated

being happy doesn't mean that everything is perfect. it just means that you've decided to look beyond the imperfections

rain

As coisas vulgares que há na vida
não deixam saudades
só as lembranças que doem
ou fazem sorrir

há gente que fica na história
da história da gente
e outras de quem nem o nome
lembramos ouvir

são emoções que dão vida
à saudade que trago
aquelas que tive contigo
e acabei por perder

há dias que marcam a alma
e a vida da gente
e aquele em que tu me deixaste
não posso esquecer...

NYC marathon...

...there is nothing like a little healthy obsession to put your mind off certain things

what have you seen?

nous avons vu des astres
et des flots, nous avons vu des sables aussi;
et, malgré bien des chocs et d'imprévus désastres,
nous nous sommes souvent ennuyés, comme ici

in Le Voyage

night owl

she walks in beauty, like the night
of cloudless climes and starry skies,
and all that's best of dark and bright
meets in her aspect and her eyes;
thus mellow'd to that tender light
which heaven to gaudy day denies.

one shade the more, one ray the less,
had half impair'd the nameless grace
which waves in every raven tress
or softly lightens o'er her face,
where thoughts serenely sweet express
how pure, how dear their dwelling-place.

and on that cheek and o'er that brow
so soft, so calm, yet eloquent,
the smiles that win, the tints that glow,
but tell of days in goodness spent,—
a mind at peace with all below,
a heart whose love is innocent.

Lord Byron

tempus fugit

crazy beautiful

you can be anywhere when your life begins. when the future opens up in front of you. and you may not even realize it at first, but it's already happening.

for you

foi para ti que criei as rosas.
foi para ti que lhes dei perfume.
para ti rasguei ribeiros
e dei ás romãs a cor do lume.

photo album [ou diário de uma viagem]

open my eyes.
late. need to rush. quick shower.
sullen eyes. lack of sleep: 3 hours max.
need to catch up.
get suitcase.
get taxi.
shit. forgot cufflinks.
quick call. no one is able to provide some. need to buy on the way.

get into 300 km/h train.
doze at the window.
exit the city.
suburban buildings. who lives here?
speeding up.
countryside. plains and more plains filled with colour and pride.
small towns powder the landscape.
heavy eyes. sleep.
wake up. still the sunny and moving landscape.
half way there.
tunnel. dark.
long time underground.
light again.
mountains. rivers in a new beautiful set.
towns getting closer. getting there.
arrive after 3 hours.

taxi. hotel.
very tired. need to recover.
spa. a quick nap.
cannot oversleep: need to there on time.
knock on the door. suit is ready.
get ready. it’s time to go.
arrive at the church.
don’t know anyone yet
wear my best smile.
congratulations are in order.
big hug.
i’m proud and very happy for you.
it starts. amazing choir.
she gets in. she’s so pretty.
i’m so proud of both.
he cannot stop caressing her hand
can’t stop smiling.
ends. sign my name. now it’s official

old and new faces.
laughs. kisses. hugs.
good to see you.
get in bus.
traffic. much time travelling.
mountains again.
night. full moon. glowing eyes.

palace in the middle of nowhere.
more people than before.
food. wine.
laughs.
more faces. more food. more wine.
stories are told. do you remember when?
pictures are taken. friends are met.

a phone call.
to her. need to share the moment.
her voice.
smile.
a promise? a dream?

magnificent and majestic rooms.
crowd sits down. music sounds.
they smile. they host.
feast surrounded by friends.
more food. more wine.
laughs.
a toast.
a foreign language is clumsily spoken.
more laughs. more toasts.
cigars.
smiles are shared.
eyes meet.

a speech. photos are shown.
i’ve been there many times. remember the good times?
promises are made to repeat these.
an announcement is made.
a new invitation. only next year.
more reasons to smile and believe in love.
even if not my own.

surround the couple. smile. toast.
music sounds again.
dance.
everyone’s so happy.
love the song. send a message.
dance more.
get everyone together.
you were there all this time.
get everyone to dance
too hot.
gardens.
mid night philosophy under the moon coloured trees
love stories are confessed.
raise a glass.
get back. new drink. dance.
im so happy for you.
very late. will miss the bus back.
run. get friends along.
trip back to the city.

alcohol, music and joy run fast in everyone.
songs are sung. more laughs.
need to find a place to go.
very very late. everything is closed.
no hope. need to call it a night.
very tired.
get back to the hotel.
late night meal shared with breakfast takers.
bed. smile.
it was a good a night.
close my eyes. sleep.

letting go

there are things i can't force.
i must adjust.
there are times when the greatest change needed is a change of my viewpoint

Denis Diderot